LoCuSt Theory

Over the last 12 to 15 months, I have really begun to appreciate, realize and bounce my thoughts about life with people whom I am close to. I have realized that I somehow tend to create adaptive models on life continuously. Given my engineering educational background science and math play a critical role apart from my bipolarity while creating these models 😉

27-28 years of existence and just a bit more than half a decade of bipolar disorder, I have come to conclude the following

The whole universe is built around Nothingness or impermanence. Actually a massive silence. The absolute truth is nothingness or silence!

My bipolar disorder has pushed me to realize this very quickly. The whole perspective in which you view the world changes when you accept it. In 2003, I faced this nirvana moment :-). Only around 2005 did I realize that I have to somehow really work on solving this issue. I didn’t have any skill sets to deal with this realization nor did I want to believe that all the activity happening all around us mounts to nothingness.

Over the last couple of years I have internally come up with a model that works for me and I see a similar model in different variants across various cultures and philosophies.

In order to find joy and growth in the space of nothingness, we need to surround ourselves with three pivotal things:

  1. Love
  2. Curiosity
  3. Strength

I feel the need to ensure that all the above mentioned items are equally balanced. A great amount of imbalance in any one of them leads to difficulty. From experience and inner reflection whenever I have landed up with depression or mania, I think its been either due to lack of one the above three things.

Another way of looking at this, look at yourself or any country or civilization. Whenever you think you or a community of people have flourished or prospered – you would really see all these three dimensions of life in balance.

The beautiful thing about this is the realization that you don’t need to attach you feelings or thoughts on bunch of specific things. Work towards having adequate of love, curiosity and strength around you & thou shall experience bliss!

Its obviously not as easy as it sounds! 🙂 You start of managing all three of them and somehow one’s mind, ego or heart gives way. Then your your luck runs out (its been my health in my case) and you fall flat and have to re-build again!

Note: I visualize almost everything in my life. Try the following exercise if it works for you in case you are experiencing a crisis! Take a piece of paper and draw a ‘big’ triangle and write Love, Curiosity and Strength at the end points. In the middle of triangle write, Truth = Nothingness (Silence) Then write things that you associate with each one of them i.e Love, Curiosity and Strength. And start thinking on how you can go about balancing all three of them. (increase or decrease!)

Catch me sometime over a cup of hot chocolate and can give you more gyan and hopefully learn from you also!

Next few posts are going on Anger and something I call the Silence Economy (just blogged!).


Published by: vinu

My life - BREESY! :-) :D Beautiful Random Enjoyable Eventful Simple Yellow Places I have lived (chronological): (country) (- state) (-- city) India - (Orissa) -- Cuttack (2yrs) -- Bhubaneshwar (3yrs) - (Maharastra) -- Bombay/Mumbai (8 + 1 yrs) - (TamilNadu) -- Madras/Chennai (6 yrs) - (Pondicherry) (1 yr) United States - (California) -- Berkeley (3 yrs) Education : IIT Madras 02, UC Berkeley 05 Work Experience: Mechanical Engineer at FORD Motor Company, India; Management Trainee at Datamatics Technologies Ltd.; Wireless Programmer at TeleCommunication Systems Inc. Passions (currently as of Dec 2005): Family, Media (visual / audio), Mobile Systems, Internet, Design Interests: Music, Movies, Photography, Enjoying nature, Playing Violin, Graphics, Business / Entrepreneurship / Managments, Spirituality, Design, Technology, Mobile / Wireless

Categories bipolar, life, me10 Comments

10 thoughts on “LoCuSt Theory”

  1. hey
    silence economy sounds interesting…
    its 2am and i can barely sleep, so visited the blog. after a long time actually….write about the silence economy

  2. Hmm may be I should try that exercise…

    BTW I got a poem for you on nothingness by Walt Whitman

    HAST never come to thee an hour,
    A sudden gleam divine, precipitating, bursting all these bubbles,
    fashions, wealth?
    These eager business aims–books, politics, art, amours,
    To utter nothingness?

    It does to me sometimes. Everything seem to be nothing. But then I try to find a purpose to go on, I go through a depression and bounce back to follow a higher purpose in life for which I think I was born, sometimes the purpose is to find that purpose itself…but reason enough to keep the chase on.

    And you knwo even I was wondering about silence, wondering if Silence is a form of potential energy, and by that means secret feelings or suppressed anger.

    Any thoughts?

  3. Hi Vinu! I saw your photos of Mumbai on CNN – I remembered that the name sounded very familiar, and they gave the link to your blog.. and then I saw a photo of myself in Berkeley on page 38 of your flickr account so I knew for sure it was you. I’m glad you are safe right now, and will keep reading your blog – I was unhappy that I lost track of you before, and had been thinking I should ask Matulya how you were doing. Anyway, you have my hugs and wishes for better days.. I don’t really know the right words but hopefully you will understand my meaning. ❤

  4. It’s a little weird to see a link to the photos of one of my Flickr contacts on the NY Times website, but apparently I really missed out since I don’t get CNN (no cable). I hope you are ok. I know you can’t be. It makes me think of New Orleans in 2005–not as scary, maybe, but that same sense of helplessness. I admire you for going out there and getting those shots. I couldn’t even summon the courage to face the aftermath of a hurricane with my camera (still can’t), yet you braved the bullets. And all through the bipolar lens.

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